The Money Train

icon1 Posted by admin in Stories on 01 18th, 2010 | no responses

money

 

If you think it, will it come? Money….that is. Lets face it, the exorbitant, racket of a cost that is necessary to go through IVF is basically non-negotiable and for most of us, crippling, financially crippling.

So, if you have been lucky enough to survive the financial bombshell, the depleting of your savings, and the embarrassment of asking family for help, where to do you turn to next if the IVF train continues to rob you of financial security? When do you say “no” and what if you don’t agree on when to stop, or how much more to spend? The words “till death do us part” make take on new meaning for those fighting the good IF fight! I wish I knew the answers and I was here to grace you all with the solutions that have worked perfectly in my life. Not even close…in fact, I’m completely out of ideas. So, what is the answer when it comes to financing another round of IVF, or even a donor-how much is too much?

I think for some the answer is to never stop, no matter what the cost, financially, emotionally, and spiritually. And I’ve seen those people myself move heaven and earth to make that dream happen. They didn’t mind taking out that second mortgage because it’s just money, right? And I know a couple who went through IVF 8 times, and after $100K-they knew that was all they could do. And three months later, they got pregnant on their own. But how do you come to an agreement when you just simply do not agree? Is this a deal breaker? What kind of terms can you and your spouse come to so that both of you can feel good about it, and feel hopeful? You can start by having the conversation, you’d be surprised how many people don’t want to have that talk–I personally would rather eat glass than talk about money! But then mixed messages and bad feelings get thrown in the pot and what you have is a disaster. The money issue is tough, I’ll give you that but just have the conversation anyway, it can’t be worse than everything you’ve been through.

Let me know how they go–I’d love to hear your solutions!

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